What If?
by BeckyC.1
Summary: What if Voldemort never existed? What if Harry had a normal childhood with his parents?
1. A Normal Day

**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or any of the charactors, just the plot**

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><p>Harry woke to someone gently shaking him.<p>

'Harry, time to get up. There's a letter waiting for you on the kitchen table.'

He instantly opened his eyes and looked at the redhead smiling down at him. 'Thanks mum!'

'Don't be long; you know what your father gets like when he's hungry!' Laughing, Lily Potter left the room, leaving her son to change.

'I resent that!' Someone said from behind her, putting their arms round her waist and pulling her close. 'I'm not that bad. Am I?'

'Course not dear.' Lily giggled, turning around and giving her husband a kiss.

'Eww, mum, dad!' The pair turned to see Harry standing in the doorway of his bedroom, and laughed at the look of disgust on his face. 'Get a room!' And with that, the young boy bounded across the hallway into the bathroom to brush his teeth.

'Now, that's an idea.'

'Mr Potter, are you trying to seduce me?'

'Maybe, is it working?'

'I'll let you know.' Lily laughed, before pulling out of his arms and setting off down the stairs to finish breakfast. James looked after her longingly, before following his son into the bathroom.

'So, Harry. Your 11th birthday is next week. What would you like?'

'Nwbomsfh.'

'Sorry, didn't quite catch that.' James told his son, smiling amusingly while Harry tried to rid his mouth of toothpaste, and somehow managed to spray it all up the wall. Pulling out his wand, James muttered 'Scourgify' and the mess on the wall disappeared.

'Thanks dad.' Harry said sheepishly. 'Emm, well, I was wondering, my one now is fine, but its a little old, and doesn't always do what I want it to...'

'Harry.' James interrupted, smiling. 'Just spit it out.'

'Well, the new Nimbus 2000 has just come out, so I was wondering, maybe if I could get it?'

'Ahh, good choice! Of course you can get it! It's had excellent reviews from Which broomstick. But come on, we'd better get downstairs before your mum sends a search party for us.'

'Kay dad, ill just put on my clothes.'

Once Harry got downstairs, his parents were both seated around the circular table in the middle of the table. Grabbing toast from the toaster, Harry sat down in his usual seat across from his dad, and was about to spread his toast before he spotted a thick envelope with green writing addressed to him in the middle of the table. Dropping his knife, he asked 'Is that what I think it is?'

'Why don't you open it and see?' Replied Lily, smiling at him.

His hands shaking, Harry flipped the envelope over and opened the envelope. Pulling out the yellow parchment, he read aloud:

'Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry

Headmaster: Albus Dumbledore (Order of Merlin, First Class, Grand Sorc., Chf. Warlock, Supreme Mugwump, International Confed. of Wizards)

Dear Mr. Potter,

We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Please find enclosed a list of all necessary books and equipment.

Term begins on September 1st. We await your owl by no later than July 31st.  
>Yours sincerely,<p>

Minerva McGonagall

Deputy Headmistress'

Eyes filled with tears of joy, Lily ran to her son and hugged him, telling him how proud she was, and how it only seemed like yesterday when she was changing his nappies.

Grinning, James patted his son on the back, saying that he would be the next generation of 'The Marauders', the infamous group of pranksters James was part of in his Hogwart days.

'Mum! Dad! Gerrof!'

'Oh, sorry dear.' Said Lily, letting go of her son and standing back, smiling at him. 'This causes for a celebration breakfast. What about pancakes?'

'I'd better go floo Sirius and Remus. They'll probably pop by soon. Lily, I'll call give you're mother as well. I might be a while; you know what she's like!' With a grin and a wink at Lily, James left the room.

As Lily started on the pancakes, Harry sat down again with a sigh. He had been dreaming of this day ever since he could remember. He was forever hearing stories from his parents and Sirius, about how great Hogwarts was, and all the brilliant pranks his father and The Marauders had pulled.

Just then, the front door flew open to reveal a handsome man with grey eyes grinning widely. Lily turned quickly, whipping out her wand in the process, only to put it back in her apron pocket and mutter something that sounded like 'Should have known…'

'Uncle Sirius!' Harry shouted, running to give his 'uncle' a hug.

'Whoa, hey there squirt!' Replied Sirius, laughing. 'A little birdie told me that you got your Hogwarts acceptance today! Now,' Sirius continued, dropping his voice to a whisper so Lily wouldn't hear him. 'You have a lot of responsibility on your shoulders. You've got to finish what your father and I started!'

'I heard that, and there is no way you will do such a thing! Harry, you will concentrate on your schoolwork, and if I even get one letter home saying you got a detention for pulling a prank…'

'You will be very proud? I know I wouldn't be. I had better get at least five!' Said James as he bounded into the room, and kissed his wife quickly before she could argue with him.

'Eww, guys! Children in the room!' Said Sirius in mock disgust, covering Harry's eyes with one of his hands and covering his own with the other.

'Sirius, you're probably more childlike than Harry.' Came an amused voice from the doorway of the kitchen.

'Remus! Glad you could make it!' James said as he pulled away from Lily and smiled at his old friend.

'Yeah, came as soon as you pulled your head out the fire. Hey Harry! How you feeling?'

'Im good.'

'Well, that's good.'

'Hey, Remus?' Lily asked.

'Yes Lily?'

'Would you like to come to Diagon Alley with us? We were planning on going this Saturday.'

'Oh, I am sorry Lily, but Im working this weekend.'

'Hey, why didn't you ask me?' Sirius pouted.

'Oh Sirius, only a full body-binder could stop you from coming.' Lily laughed.

'I suppose. Still would have liked to have been asked...'

'Sirius?' Asked James suddenly, taking hold of Sirius's hand. 'Will you come to Diagon Alley with us?'

'Of course James!' Sirius replied, fluttering his eyelashes before pulling James into a big hug, while everyone else in the kitchen laughed.

'We can get your things for school while we're there.'

'Great!' Harry grinned. 'Can't wait!'

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><p><strong>So what did you think? Don't forget to review!<strong>


	2. A Day in Diagon Alley

'Morning!' Called Sirius as he came bounding into the Potter's kitchen.

'Morning Sirius!' Replied Harry. Looking around, Sirius frowned.

'Where are your mum and dad?'

'Upstairs, I think. Not too sure to be honest.' Shrugging, Harry went back to his toast.

Going up the stairs two at a time, Sirius paused, listening hard. He could hear a shuffling noise coming from James and Lily's bedroom. Grinning, Sirius transformed himself into a large, shaggy dog. Pushing open the door with his paw, he bounded into the room and jumped onto James and Lily who had moments before been kissing.

'Ahhhhhh!' James shouted as he fell over and Sirius jumped onto his chest and started licking his face. 'Padfoot! What are you doing here? Get off!' Lily stared at the two men on the floor for a moment, before she started to laugh. Clutching her sides, she collapsed onto the bed, tears rolling down her face.

'Lily! Get Padfoot off of me!'

Suddenly, Lily had an idea. Still giggling, she pulled her wand from her pocket and did a complicated movement with her wand. A pink, studded dog collar and leash appeared out of thin air. Lily waved her wand again, before quickly moving across the room and placed the collar on Sirius. Pulling on the leash, Lily led Sirius out the house, and tied him to the fence.

'Now, be a good boy Padfoot!' Laughing, Lily went back into the house.

Sirius tried desperately to change back, but found out he couldn't. Growling, he tried to use his paws to break the collar, but to no avail. Finally giving up, he rested his head on his paws.

Looking out the kitchen window, James chuckled. 'How come Padfoot isn't able to change back?' He asked, turning to Lily.

'I may have put a charm on it, preventing him from turning back…' Replied Lily, giving James a sly smile.

'I love you, you know that?'

'You may have mentioned it before now.' Lily answered, leaning in to kiss her husband, just as Sirius started howling outside. Cursing, James pulled away and flicked his wand at the window and Sirius was quiet instantly. 'Merlin, I love magic. Now, where were we?'

'I think we were somewhere here.' Said Lily, before bringing James's lips crushing down onto her own.

'Mum, have you seen my trainers?' Harry shouted from the next room. Sighing, Lily, pulled away, and called 'I'll be there in a minute!'

'But mum, we need to leave in a couple of minutes, or we won't have time to get most of my stuff before we meet Ron!'

Sending James an apologetic look, Lily left the room to hunt for her son's trainers. James turned to the window, and pointed his wand at Padfoot. The dog collar disappeared, and in the place of the dog that sat there only moments ago lay a man on his stomach. Jumping up, Sirius sprinted in the door and pulled out his wand.

'You're going to pay for that Prongs!' He shouted, aiming a spell at James's head.

Laughing, James ducked and ran out the room. 'Oh, you had better run Prongs! You too Lils! When I'm done with you two…' Sirius didn't bother to finish the threat.

'But Sirius, pink was so you colour!' Lily said as she entered the kitchen, trying to keep a straight face and not quite succeeding.

'I look great in everything. But don't change the subject. I don't appreciate being chained up outside!'

'Aww, come on Padfoot! You would have done the same to me!' James exclaimed as he returned to the room. 'Anyhow, we'd better leave now or we won't have time to meet the Weasleys and get all Harry's stuff for school. Hurry up!'

Huffing, Sirius followed James out of the kitchen into the sitting room, to where Harry was standing round a roaring fire. 'We thought flooing would be easiest. You can go first Sirius.' Lily smiled, holding out a pot filled with sparkling silver floo powder that she had just picked up the on top of the fireplace.

'Kay,' Sirius replied. 'Here goes nothing.'

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><p>By the time the Potter's and the Weasleys (and Sirius of course) had arranged to meet, Harry had already got his school robes and his school books, along with his potions ingredients and equipment. They had decided to meet outside Florean Fortescue's Ice Cream Parlour.<p>

'There they are!' Harry exclaimed, before hurrying towards the group of people huddled around on of the tables outside the parlour, all of which had bright red hair.

'Harry!' Mrs Weasley called, pulling him into a bone-crushing hug. 'How are you?'

'I'm fine Mrs Weasley!' Harry choked out.

'Mum! Can't you see your choking him?' Ron told him mother, grinning at Harry over her shoulder. 'How are you mate?' He asked, pulling Harry into a manly, back-pounding hug.

'Lily!' Mrs Weasley shouted, before running to Harry's mum and pulling her into another hug. 'So good to see you! You haven't been round for dinner since… Well, I can't even remember the last time you were around!'

'Sorry Molly, we've been really busy.' Lily answered sheepishly.

'Well, why don't you come round tomorrow night?' Asked Molly, releasing the younger woman and smiling at her good-naturally.

'I don't know Molly; we wouldn't want to be burden.' James told her.

'Oh, nonsense James! I have seven mouths to feed every day, I am pretty sure I can fit in three more!' Sirius coughed loudly and fakely. 'Oh, and you too Sirius!'

'Thank you Mrs Weasley! So generous of you!'

'Come on guys! And, err, girls! And, emm, women! Oh, I give up!' James shouted. 'Let's split up. Me, Lily and Harry will go with Molly, Arthur, Ron and Ginny to Ollivanders. Percy, can I trust you to be by yourself?'

'Of course, Mr Potter! I was recently became a prefect you know!' Replied Percy, in his usual pompous manner.

'Everyone knows you've been made prefect Percy!' Fred told Percy, sounding annoyed.

'And what about us? What're we supposed to do? Knit?' George added.

'You can come with me!' Sirius told the twins. 'I've been meaning to check out that new joke shop…'

'Now, I'm really not sure if that's a good idea.'

'Come on Molly, we'll only be an hour or two.' Arthur told his wife. 'How much harm can they do?'

Fred, George and Sirius smiled at each other, identical evil gleams in their eyes. Luckily, Mrs Weasley did not notice, otherwise she would never have allowed them to go off together.

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><p>Once the boys had purchased their wands (Harry's wand was made of holly, was eleven inches and had a core of a single phoenix feather; Ron had opted for fourteen inch willow wand which contained unicorn tail hair), the group made their way to the leaky cauldron, where they had arranged to meet earlier.<p>

'Prongs! And my pretty flower Lily! No, my Lily pretty flower! Wait, that's not right either! Oh well, you know what I mean.'

'Sirius, your drunk!' James told him, wrinkling his nose as his best friend breathed his alcohol breath on him.

'No, I'm not, Im just slightly intoxicated…' Padfoot yawned, before resting his head on James' shoulder and falling asleep.

'I had better get Sirius home. I'll meet you two back at the house. Bye Molly, Arthur. I will see you tomorrow.' James smiled, before disapparited with Sirius.

'We had better get home too Harry. We will see all tomorrow!' Throwing floo powder one of the fireplaces, Lily shouted 'The Potter's!' Before she, too, disappeared. Harry followed suit, holding tightly onto his purchases.

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><p><strong>Sorry to anyone who has this story on alert, but i noticed some mistakes and had too change them. Sorry guys! And don't forget to review! :)<strong>


	3. First Day of Hogwarts

'Mum, have you seen my History of Magic textbook?'

'On top of your trunk dear!' Lily replied tiredly. It was Harry's first day of Hogwarts today, and the Potter family were running late as per usual.

'Okay, who has moved my jumper? I left it over the back of the sofa.'

'James, it's hung up in our wardrobe.'

'Lily pad, where is my cloak?'

'Sirius, you weren't wearing a cloak when you got here.'

'I know, I just felt left out.' Sirius grinned at her, while Lily rolled her eyes.

Once everyone was organised, the group ran out to the car parked at the front of their house. 'How come I don't get to sit in the front?' Sirius pouted.

'Well, I'm driving and do you really think Lily will give up her seat for you? Doubtful mate.' James smirked over his shoulder to his best mate, while Sirius stuck out his tongue maturely.

Before long, they had arrived at King's Cross Station. Pushing a trolley that held Harry's trunk, James ran towards the barrier leading to platform 9 and ¾, while Lily, Harry and Sirius tried to keep up.

'James! After you drove here like a maniac, we still have half an hour till the train leaves!' Lily wheezed, clutching the stitch in her side, having finally reaching the place where James had stopped.

'I thought you could do with the exercise. You're seriously unfit Lils.' Replied James with a grin.

'No, _I'm _Sirius!'

'Padfoot, that joke stopped being funny in fourth year. You're starting to get a little repetitive.'

Laughing, Sirius ran straight through the barrier. Lily rolled her eyes, before following him, except at a much slower speed, as she was still a little out of breath. Within seconds, she, too, had disappeared.

'Come on son, you know what your mother is like when she thinks we're late.' Clapping a hand on Harry's shoulder, James gave him a little push towards the barrier.

Taking a deep breath, Harry walked a little shakily through the brick wall. He squeezed his eyes shut just before he made contact with it, expecting to collide with the cool brick. When he didn't crash into it, Harry opened his eyes to see a gigantic, gleaming red stream train. Above him was a huge sign reading _Hogwarts Express 11 o'clock._ All around Harry there was people of all different ages. Hundreds of owls were squawking. He vaguely recognised one or two people who had met when his parents had invited them around to dinner.

'Harry! Over here!' Lily and Sirius were standing a short distance away, talking to the Weasleys.

'Heya mate. I can't believe this is our first day of Hogwarts! I've been waiting for this day ever since Bill went, and I can't believe it's finally here!' Ron exclaimed.

'I wish I was your age again.' Sirius stated, staring longingly at the train. 'What I wouldn't give to go back to Hogwarts for just one more year. Oh, the pranks I pulled…'

'The pranks _we _pulled.' James said indignantly 'Although, Fred and George could almost give us a run for our money. _Almost._'

'That reminds me!' Mrs Weasley said, turning to the two twins. 'If I get one more letter home this year that you've blown up a toilet or something…'

'Mum, we've never-'

'Blown up at toilet. But thanks-'

'For the idea!'

Meanwhile, Lily was trying to comfort Ginny.

'But I want to go _now_!'

'I know, but you're not old enough. But just think, next year it'll be you we will be waving goodbye to!'

Ginny didn't look convinced, but smiled none-the-less. Just then, a piercing whistle sounded. All the pupils started to move towards the train, the younger ones struggling to heave their luggage up, while the older ones flicked their wands at the heavy trunks, making them as light as a feather.

Harry joined the Weasleys on the train, before turning around and leaning out the open window. As the train sped up, he waved to them. James ran along side the train, bumping into a great number of people. Finally, the train grew too fast for him to keep up with, and even after it rounded the corner he still waved. Harry smiled, before retreating to the compartment he was sharing with Ron.

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><p>The train journey went rather slowly. A round-faced, forgetful boy and a rather bossy girl with a lot of bushy hair who were about Harry's age came in looking for a lost toad, Harry had an encounter with an unfriendly Draco Malfoy, and the two boys ate nearly double their weight in various sweets when the old witch came around with the trolley. Finally, just as it was beginning to get dark, the train started to slow down. Once it had stopped, the boys pulled their trunks down from the overhead rack and made their way off the train and onto the platform.<p>

'Firs'-years! Firs' years o'er here! 'Ello Harry!'

'Hey Hagrid!' Harry grinned, shouting over the heads of the students in front of him. 'This is my friend Ron; he's a first year too.'

'Another Weasley eh? I spend half me life chasing your brothers 'way from the forest!'

Once all the first years had gathered around Hagrid, he led them towards a lake that had a great number of small, wooden boats.

'Right you lot, four to a boat. No shovvin' now, you'll all get a chance!'

Harry got in a boat with Ron, the forgetful boy and the bossy girl, whose names turned out to be Neville Longbottom and Hermione Granger.

'I know you!' Harry suddenly exclaimed. 'Your Frank and Alice Longbottom's son! My mum and dad work with him.'

'_Your _James and Lily Potter's son?' Harry nodded. Before Neville could reply, the boats emerged from a tunnel and the first years got their first glimpse of Hogwarts. It stood out against the inky black sky, with thousands of lit-up windows casting long shadows across the grounds. All they could do was stare, before the boats stopped at the edge of the lake and Hagrid shouted at them to get out.

They were all led up the sloping grounds, before Hagrid held up a huge fist and knocked on the huge oak door. The bang echoed across the grounds, making the first years jump. Then, a witch opened the door. She had black hair pulled back into a tight bun, square glasses and a stern expression. _'This must be Professor McGonagall!'_ Thought Harry. _'Dad always said she was strict, but I didn't expect her look it as well!'_

McGonagall led the first years into a side chamber. She left them for a couple of minutes, before returning and explaining the rules. All too soon, they were led to the great hall. Once the door was thrown open, Harry gasped. He had heard tales from his parents and Sirius about the great hall, but they had failed to mention the vast scale of it. It was huge, and it was hard to believe there was a roof, since it looked just like the sky outside.

Once Harry could tear his eyes away from the hall itself, he spied a tattered hat balancing on a three-legged stool. He noticed all the students seemed to be watching it expectantly, so he turned back to it. Everyone was silent for a while, until the brim opened and it burst into song:

_Oh, you may not think I'm pretty,  
>But don't judge on what you see,<br>I'll eat myself if you can find  
>A smarter hat than me.<br>You can keep your bowlers black,  
>Your top hats sleek and tall,<br>For I'm the Hogwarts Sorting Hat  
>And I can top them all.<br>There's nothing hidden in your head  
>The Sorting Hat can't see,<br>So try me on and I will tell you  
>Where you ought to be.<br>You might belong in Gryffindor,  
>Where dwell the brave at heart,<br>Their daring, nerve and chivalry  
>Set Gryffindors apart;<br>You might belong in Hufflepuff,  
>Where they are just and loyal,<br>Those patient Hufflepuffs are true  
>And unafraid of toil;<br>Or yet in wise old Ravenclaw,  
>If you've a steady mind,<em>

_Where those of wit and learning,  
>Will always find their kind;<br>Or perhaps in Slytherin  
>You'll make your real friends,<br>Those cunning folk use any means  
>To achieve their ends.<br>So put me on! Don't be afraid!  
>And don't get in a flap!<br>You're in safe hands (though I have none)  
>For I'm a Thinking Cap!<em>

The hall burst into applause. When it had quieted down, McGonagall started to read out names. Finally, it was his turn.

'Potter, Harry!'

Immediately, people started whispering all over the hall.

'Potter, as in James and Lily's son?'

'_He_ is the famous aurors' son?'

'I wonder what house he'll be in…'

Harry made his way towards the ancient hat. Slowly, he sat on the stool. The last thing he saw before the hat covered his eyes was hundreds of faces, craning their necks to try and get a glimpse of him.

'_Well well, what have we here? Another Potter eh? Well, you've got potential, no doubt about that. Your certainly smart, and there is courage, my what courage. But where will I place you?'_

'Not Slytherin!' Harry thought.

_Don't worry about that boy; although you are cunning enough, Slytherin is not the right house for you. It had better be __**GRYFFINDOR!**__'_

The hat shouted out the 'Gryffindor', and the Gryffindor table exploded in shouts and cheers. Harry shakily made his way towards all the noise, and sat down next a boy called Seamus. Grinning widely, he watched his best friend sorted into Gryffindor as well. Life couldn't get any better.

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><p><strong>So, what do you think? Sorry for the late update, I know, im a terrible person, but ive been ridiculously busy lately. Dont forget to Review!<strong>

**BTW, the next chapter will be letter between Harry, his parents and Sirius :)**


	4. Letters Part I

Harry – Normal

**James – Bold**

_Lily – Italic_

Sirius – Underlined

I'm going to write one letter from Snape, and that will just be in normal, but I'll put an author's note before it

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><p>Dear Mum and Dad,<p>

I'm in Gryffindor! So are Ron and a boy called Neville Longbottom. I think you're friends with his parents?

Everyone keeps staring at me. It is starting to get quite irritating. Every time I pass they say something about you two being famous aurors. How come I don't know anything about that?

Fred and George are in Gryffindor too (obviously!). It's only the first day, and they've already pulled a pretty amazing prank! They changed the colour of the Slytherin's robes from black to red and gold, and no one could figure out how to change them back! You should have seen their faces!

I had potions today. Professor Snape seems to hate me. He took away 2 points from Gryffindor because I couldn't remember everything from One Thousand Magical Herbs and Fungi! And he bulled everyone but Malfoy, who he seems to like. Needless to say, he's not my favourite professor…

Write to you soon

Love

Harry

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><p><strong>Dear Harry<strong>

**Its fantastic news that you got into Gryffindor! Although there was no way you couldn't be, what with having Lily and I as your parents. And yes, Frank and Alice Longbottom are great friends of ours. Lily has been meaning to ask them to dinner for ages…**

**Well, apart from Alice and Frank, it is very rare for a married couple to both be successful aurors. I suppose you're noticed more than Neville because your mother and I are slightly higher up in the department than they are. My advice would be to just ignore them. It shouldn't matter how rich or successful someone's parents are. True friends will stick by you through thick and thin, whether you're the richest man in Britain or live in a house that is hardly big enough to swing a kneazle.**

**Those twins! They'll be the next generation of marauders, you mark my words. Though, that said, they had better tone it down a bit. Their mother won't be happy if she gets a letter home about them in the first week, and you know what Molly is like when she's angry!**

**Snape did what? When I get my hands on him… **_Harry, it's your mother here. Your dad is currently on the floor in a full body-binder curse. I had to! Otherwise he would have gone to Hogwarts and done something stupid like punch Snape in the face. Or have gotten him arrested. Or possibly both._

_Trust Severus to favour the most prejudiced pureblood in Hogwarts. Though he and Malfoy senior were friends in Hogwarts while your father and I was there._

_And remember, under __**no circumstances**__ will you take part in __**any**__ of Fred and George's pranks. I know you are your father's son, but that is no excuse to get a detention in your first week!_

_Be good!_

_Love_

_Mum _**and Dad**

**P.S. Ignore your mother, if you get in a detention in your first week I will be incredibly proud.**

_P.P.S. Ignore your father. He's an idiot._

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><p><span>Dear Harry<span>

I am shocked and insulted that you have not written to me yet! Come on, I'm your Godfather and favourite uncle, I have a right!

Anyway, how's school? Although Lily has banned me from giving you any prank ideas, I'm going to anyway. I never listened to your mother when she was a prefect at school, and I'm not going to start now. I have enclosed a box of all the prank materials you will require. DO NOT SHOW ANYONE OR THEY WILL BE CONFINSCATED! Except maybe Ron and the twins. And remind the twins that I say _the charms corridor. _They will know what I mean.

I hear Snape has been giving you a hard time? I have also enclosed a letter to him. When he gets angry, just tell him it's from me. If he try's to get you in trouble, remind him it is incredibly unfair, due to the fact you did not actually write the letter, you just delivered it.

Anyway, must dash, Lily has just discovered I replaced her shampoo with muggle hair dye and she just came out of the shower with green hair.

Love

Sirius

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><p><span>Dear Snivellous<span>

You are a slimeball who needs to wash his hair. Also, you are a bully who gets kicks out of tormenting young boys. You have no friends and look like a bat. It is no wonder you have never had a girlfriend. Leave my godson alone, or I will be forced to take action and turn you into a slug while you sleep. 

I hate you.

Sirius Black

P.S. Get a nose job. It should be illegal to be as ugly as you are.

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><p>Dear Mum and Dad<p>

That makes sense. Although I'm pretty certain Neville is pretty glad the attention is on me instead of him. I'm not. I wish they would just leave me alone.

It's too late. They set off dung bombs in the charms corridor, and bewitched them so they would remain there for at least 24 hours. Unlucky for them, McGonagall caught them running away and sent a letter home to Mrs Weasley.

Snape is still a moody git. Ever since I gave him Sirius' letter he seemed to have backed off a bit with the verbal insults, but takes every opportunity to deduct points, even if it's something stupid. The other day he actually took 5 points away from Gryffindor because my hair was a little bit messier than usual! At least I wash mine…

Sorry about the detention, but it wasn't my fault! How was I supposed to know that if you leave a firework under someone's chair it will explode at send them flying in the air. In my defence, Malfoy deserved it, and the look on his face was more that worth the hundred lines McGonagall gave me!

Must dash, I've still got homework for Snape that I need to finish.

Love

Harry

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><p><strong>Dear Harry<strong>

**Don't worry, they'll soon get bored. Trust me; I know what it's like to have everyone talking about you. One time in fourth year your mother was a bit enthusiastic with her jinx's, and I had to walk around school for a week with bright pink hair, as no one could figure out how to change it back.** _I said I was sorry! Anyway, you turned all my robes yellow! _**Yeah, but you were smart enough to change them back. I had to ask Dumbledore to return my hair to its normal colour!**

**We know about the twins' prank. We were at Molly's for dinner when she got the letter from Dumbledore. Boy was she mad! She was planning on sending them a howler when we left, so I'm sure you (and the rest of the Great Hall) will hear just how angry she is!**

**That little git! He actually took away points from Gryffindor because your hair was messy? It's not your fault you inherited the Potter gene! And, if he is anything like he was in school, his hair looks like it hasn't been washed in years!**

**Lily went mental at Sirius when she found out he gave you the legendary "Marauders' Prank Pack". All I will say is this: use it well**. _You will do no such thing! _**Aww, come on Lily!****He is only a first year, and by the time he knows enough magic to do any real magic, he won't have time to because he'll be in amongst exams**! _You and Sirius seemed to find a way! If my memory is correct, which is pretty likely, on the day before exams started, you two set off fireworks around the school and no one could figure out how to get rid of them, so they had to reschedule some of the exams! _**Oh yeah, forgot about that…**

**Anyway, your first flying lesson is next week! I bet you'll be brilliant, you've been flying since you were five! I was one of the best Chasers at Hogwarts, and your mother could have been a fantastic beater if she wasn't so obsessed with schoolwork! **_Schoolwork is important! Anyway, I didn't want to get stuck with Sirius during practise. _Oi! I will have you know I am an amazing beater! I bet you were just scared I would show you up. **Hello guys, writing a letter here! Stop stealing my quill! Anyway, back to the point. I know first years don't get to try out for Quitach team, but next year you're sure to be a seeker! You've got the right build for it, and you're pretty fast on your new broomstick! **

**Anyway, I had better go, emergency at work. Bet it's just Moody making sure we have 'CONSTANT VIGILANCE!'**

**Love **

_Mum _**and Dad**

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><p>(AN The next letter will be Snape's)

Dear Black

Go to hell.

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><p><strong>AN Okay, that's it for this chapter! I'm sooo sorry about how long it took me to update, but my internet has been broken for AGES and it kinda made it hard to update. Forgive me?**


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